MY CANCER STORY - Chapter Two

CHAPTER TWO - Secret behind the Shadows

1st Dec 2020, everyone wanting the horrible year to end soon and me just hoping my X-ray to be Normal. But it was not, the doctor found some mediastinal widening, he asked me to do more tests. The doctor suspected to be Tuberculosis and even I thought it could be TB, I must have contracted it from my patients. 2 days passed, got my CT report, for the first time I got shattered because of my report. The report stated that I have enlarged lymph nodes all over my mediastinal area. It could be Tuberculosis but the report also stated another word "LYMPHOMA". My mom started crying and my adrenaline was in its peak. 

I called my doctor, he gave me some confidence and told me not to decide anything until the biopsy confirms the diagnosis. I was not in Chennai, had to go to another doctor in Coimbatore. Thanks to my doctor again, he referred me to the right person. The doctors decided to do an excision biopsy of the nodule in my neck. 

I am actually a strong person or at least everyone around me thinks so. The first time doctor asked me to get admitted a day or two for surgery, that's when I realized I too have nosocomephobia (fear of hospitalization). I have been in hospitals for 5 years now, seeing patients everyday, treating them, unable to feel their emotional stress and seeing them die. But, getting admitted was a nightmare, I started asking my doctor to do the biopsy with local anesthesia just to avoid the admission. But it was a failure the surgeon wanted to remove the nodule completely, as it was supraclavicular and pretty deep, he knew the risks and wanted to handle the surgery under general anesthesia. My fear is now at its peak and somehow managed to hide it from my parents. Asked my friend to stay with me in the hospital to forget about the surgery a bit. 

Date : 7th December, 2020

Place: Ramakrishna Hospital, Coimbatore 

Morning around 10, I had an appointment with my Pulmonologist, he asked me to get admitted on the same day. I got a bit nervous and asked a lot of questions. That's when he asked me to meet the surgeon directly and check if the biopsy could me done under local anesthesia. But that failed, but something positive happened. The surgeon was actually the college senior of our family friend who was an anesthesiologist. This made us more comfortable and I completely believed the surgeon.

Around 12 noon, I made up my mind to get admitted on the same day. Due to the pandemic, I needed a COVID testing before getting admitted. I was advised to take a throat swab 2 days back, the results came out negative for COVID after all that trips for a month, I was still tested negative.

Around 5pm IST, I was admitted in the hospital before which I had a lot of testing and had to see the cardiologist for getting a fitness, all these are procedures for the surgery which will be happening at 9am the next day.

In the hospital room, the nightmare started.. 

Any hospital admission the first thing to be done, is your I.V line. That is the most difficult part in my case, my veins are pretty deep, obviously due to my weight and the worst case they are very thin too. The nurses tried pricking me a dozen times and finally found a vein and started off with IV fluids. I was not supposed to eat anything not even water after 10pm that night. I had another job to do that night, they asked me to shave off my axillary hair and my pubic hair. This time my medical brain and my anxious mind has started a war, my medical brain telling me that this is a basic procedure for every surgery but my mind already speaking about the complications. My friend helped me overcome it, asking me about our own hospital experiences and Operation theater experiences. Successfully completed the task of shaving my hair. Had a number of phone calls before dozing off.

The next day started off too early at around 6am. My first surgery ever in 22 years was pretty interesting.